Motherhood: A Balancing Act: Part II-Rejoining the Workforce
Previously, I spoke about trying to Balance my life out
after a baby and how I was completely dropping the ball, among other things.
You can read it here.
Teaching was always my calling in life. When I was little
and someone asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up, I never answered “A
Princess, or “She-Ra” or a “doctor” or a “lawyer”. I simply answered “A
Teacher.”
Someone once told me that teachers were not made but born
that way. This profession truly is a calling, and I heard my name being called
loud and clear from the time I was old enough to play school with my stuffed
animals and my baby dolls. Being a teacher for me was my niche. It was were I
belonged.
Everything else in my world could be falling apart and to pieces (and has) but I still had my job to cling to. I had my students.
My house might have been disorganized disarray but my classroom was organized down to the last book. I had filing systems, book systems, and lists for my lists. My main strengths were always my planning and organizing. I guess that is why I like to plan well anything-parties, birthdays, trips). If the truth be known, the easiest way to make me happy and make me feel useful is to give me something to plan.
My marriage (not this one) might have been crumbling in around me, but you would never know it. Not at school. At school, I was different. I was in my element. Looking back on it now, if I had not had my job, I might have went straight-jacket psycho during these major upheavals in my life. But my job kept me grounded; it kept me focused and secure in an otherwise crazy time in my life. It kept me going.
Before I got pregnant, actually before I even married
Jeffrey, I had this notion that if I ever did get pregnant (which was a real
doubt in my mind that I would ever want to have a carbon copy of me or worse,
my spouse running around) that I would casually take my 6 week maternity leave
and then be right back without missing a step. I knew I couldn't stay away
from the job that held me together during one of the toughest times in my life.
Then, I married Jeffrey and go pregnant with Korbin Bru.
I began thinking, Welllllll, I could take my sick days that I had banked up off, and just stay out through the semester and come back at the beginning of the New Year. I told myself that would make much more sense anyway, instead of flipping back and forth with teachers. Or at least that is what I tried to convince myself of.
Then, Korbin Bru came along and changed my life, my world forever, on September 7, 2012. It wasn’t until about Thanksgiving that I started getting very antsy about returning to work. I started doubting if I should leave my son. Truth is he slept so crappy at 2-3 hour stretches, I didn't know if I could physically do it on the rest he allowed me at night.
However, around Christmas time, I became resigned to the fact that I was going to have to suck it up and go back to work. Then, Korbin became sick and was diagnosed with RSV. He was put on breathing treatments around the clock 24 hours a day 5-6 times a day. I knew I couldn't trust anyone else to giving him the treatments or the other medications that he had to take. The poor baby had 8 different things that he had to have everyday that his changing table was starting to look like a mini pharmacy. So I didn’t return to work until a couple of months later, when I had a healthy baby boy again.
We finally decided, well more likely, our back account decided that it was time for me to return to work. During this time, my husband was asked to resign from his position at his company and decided to take time off before going back to work. Fortunately for him, he is well known in his business and had his pick of different job opportunities that we knew that he could have a job the same day he resigned. That was a relief. It is also a good thing that we both believe in saving for a rainy day because it allowed us to both have time off to take care of our little man.
Everything else in my world could be falling apart and to pieces (and has) but I still had my job to cling to. I had my students.
My house might have been disorganized disarray but my classroom was organized down to the last book. I had filing systems, book systems, and lists for my lists. My main strengths were always my planning and organizing. I guess that is why I like to plan well anything-parties, birthdays, trips). If the truth be known, the easiest way to make me happy and make me feel useful is to give me something to plan.
My marriage (not this one) might have been crumbling in around me, but you would never know it. Not at school. At school, I was different. I was in my element. Looking back on it now, if I had not had my job, I might have went straight-jacket psycho during these major upheavals in my life. But my job kept me grounded; it kept me focused and secure in an otherwise crazy time in my life. It kept me going.
I began thinking, Welllllll, I could take my sick days that I had banked up off, and just stay out through the semester and come back at the beginning of the New Year. I told myself that would make much more sense anyway, instead of flipping back and forth with teachers. Or at least that is what I tried to convince myself of.
Then, Korbin Bru came along and changed my life, my world forever, on September 7, 2012. It wasn’t until about Thanksgiving that I started getting very antsy about returning to work. I started doubting if I should leave my son. Truth is he slept so crappy at 2-3 hour stretches, I didn't know if I could physically do it on the rest he allowed me at night.
However, around Christmas time, I became resigned to the fact that I was going to have to suck it up and go back to work. Then, Korbin became sick and was diagnosed with RSV. He was put on breathing treatments around the clock 24 hours a day 5-6 times a day. I knew I couldn't trust anyone else to giving him the treatments or the other medications that he had to take. The poor baby had 8 different things that he had to have everyday that his changing table was starting to look like a mini pharmacy. So I didn’t return to work until a couple of months later, when I had a healthy baby boy again.
We finally decided, well more likely, our back account decided that it was time for me to return to work. During this time, my husband was asked to resign from his position at his company and decided to take time off before going back to work. Fortunately for him, he is well known in his business and had his pick of different job opportunities that we knew that he could have a job the same day he resigned. That was a relief. It is also a good thing that we both believe in saving for a rainy day because it allowed us to both have time off to take care of our little man.
