Memorial Day From a Soldier's Wife's Perspective

I am a Soldier's wife. I have heard stories that have made the hairs on my arms stand on and UP on end. I know that when my husband dies, I will hear a 21 gun salute. I will receive a folded up flag. I also know that I will bury him with his bronze star and his purple heart because of the acts that my husband committed while in a place that Christians would attribute to HELL. 

Jeffrey is a hero. Jeffrey is my husband. Jeffrey is a SOLDIER.

My husband is first and foremost a soldier. Being a solider will remain with him until the day that he dies. It is like it is embedded into his DNA. It is like a breath of air. Every breath he takes, is one of appreciation. Appreciation that he made it home to start his family. Appreciation that he is allowed to live his life. Not that the life isn't complicated with the past, as I learned on the night that I met him (which is another story).

So, today I asked him if he could describe Memorial Day. Here is what he had to say: 

"On the eighth day, God made a soldier"

"It is really a day to reflect on all my fallen comrades. Friends, Brothers. A day to reflect on our veterans who are missing in action or who gave their lives for our freedoms that most people take for granted. A day to remember what our country really is made of. Men and women who are not afraid to sacrifice themselves to protect others. For me, it is a day for me to reflect on what I have done. Beyond the losses, the sacrifices, the time away from our families, there are true bonds that form. It is really a brotherhood. You have to trust the person beside you, behind you, in front of you. And sometimes, you lose that person. Sometimes a mine goes off unexpectedly. Sometimes, an IED blows up in your face. Sometimes, a Humvee gets hit with a RPG. Unfortunately, the only ones left to deal with whatever happens is the brotherhood/sisterhood. We are the ones there. We see it first hand, and we live it. 

Some people look at war with rose colored glasses. They see only what they want to see, no matter what side they are on. It doesn't matter, and it will never matter because in a person eyes, (especially those who have never been in war), in their eyes, they are the ones that are right and the others are wrong. Period. It isn't always that crystal clear. There is no crystal ball predicting the future, and if there were, I would maybe have made slightly different decisions regarding my leadership. 

Unfortunately there are gray areas that frequently peek around the corner. The black and white areas that people love to imagine exists really do not in the war zone. Would one really care if the RPG being pointed at them (or worse one of their family members) was held by a child? Would it make any difference if that person was an adult? As a soldier, I will tell you, you can handle a RPG pointed at you, you can accept the fact that you are going to die. 

You can accept the fact that you will never see your wife's beautiful smile again or ever hear your children's laughter again. The part that is the most difficult is seeing your brother/sister being in the line of fire. And for that, you will lay down your life. 

You will throw everything to the sidelines, and it won't matter if you are a father who needs to come home for your son, and it won't matter if you need to come home your husband or wife, and it wouldn't matter if you came home because you were hurt. In the end, it doesn't matter how you come home, as long as you come home.

I am a lot of things. I am a father. I am a husband. I am a provider. I am a manager. I am a soldier. But most importantly... I am... your FREEDOM!"

Wedding: Our First Road Trip with a Baby-Part II

So, we survived the road trip down to Nashville unscathed. When we arrived at my aunt's home, Korbin Bru was hungry and in desperate need of a new diaper. So needless to say, he wasn't too happy with the relatives when they started in toward him. He has a little bit of stranger anxiety any way. It does take him a while to warm up to people. It was a little rough on him, and I was worried about how he would react at the wedding with all those people. However, he reacted very well. By that time he had had enough time to acclimate to the environment and was comfortable enough to let other people hold him.



My men in black. 

  The groom waiting on his bride to walk down the aisle. One of my favorite things (to steal an idea presented in a movie-28 Dresses-that I thought before the movie came out) is while everyone is looking at the bride, I like to look at the groom. His expression says it all. 

 His beautiful sister, watching from her seat. Korbin Bru was quite taken with Kelly. In truth, he was quite taken with any young, pretty girl that smiled at him. However, he easily went to Kelly and smiled at her whenever she talked to him. I think that my son is quite the flirt. How could I expect any different? I mean he is my son and it has always been well known that I tend to be "overly" nice (a perceived flirt)



The Vows

Korbin Bru watching the festivities from his seat. He had a tie and a cumber-bun but those didn't work out so well. We bought him this 5 piece suit from Amazon. I originally had something from Etsy picked out but decided to save it for his first birthday as my mom thought showing off his chunky little thighs might not be that appropriate. It turned out to be a good idea because it was a little nippy out. Prior ot the ceremony, I was scouting out exit plan strategies just in case the baby decided to throw a little temper tantrum in the middle of the I do's. Prior to the ceremony start, I noticed him getting a little wiggly and fussy, so we gave him a bottle (it was close to snack time anyway) and he was perfect through the whole ceremony. 

Mother and Son dance. I am not a big crier. My first relationship made me be tough in terms of not crying about things. However, this touched me. This re-winded me to think of the first time I danced with my father and what he must have been thinking, and then fast forwarded me to the future-to me dancing with my son on his wedding day-if the Lord permits.  This moment between the two of them was so sweet. A mother letting go of her now married son and her son with clearly tears in his eyes having their dance. And no, I don't believe my that she stepped on his foot was the reason that he was crying. I hope to raise a son like my cousin. A man who is not afraid to cry, who loves his family with all his heart, and who has such a good heart that it causes the room to tilt and twirl because he is in it. This young man was the closest thing to a brother that I ever had. You see, being adopted I never really fit in anywhere in the family. I was kind of always the 'black sheep." Not that I was an outcast or anything, but I didn't fit, age wise with anyone. I was the youngest grandchild by quite a few years, and he was the oldest great grand-child. However, I was still closer in age to him. He became my "brother from another mother" type of thing. 

 

Korbin Bru and Gamma after dinner. I will tell you, dinner without a high chair is TOUGH! It is hard to hold a wriggling baby while another person is trying to aim a spoon with a liquid substance at his mouth without getting it all over the table, the baby or ourselves. Another thing to always have in your bag for such an occasion where a "Real Meal" isn't possible:  Plum Organics, dispensing spoon, and Similac liquid formula. When you have no other options, even if breastfeeding, I still used this as a supplement when breastfeeding just was not an option and I would be too shy to just whip it out anyway. These products always have a permanent location in my diaper bag. This was the first time that I have had to use the spoon as I always try to plan around feeding times so that he isn't out at that time but this was the first occasion that I couldn't do that. Since then I have used the spoon again, and still have to say that the creator is a genius. We usually make our own food, but the convenience of these little packs and spoons are just perfect for these type of occasions.

Father and Daughter dance. They invited all the fathers and daughters onto the dance floor. I didn't even ask my own dad to get out there with me, although it would have been nice to dance with him again. This is the gorgeous Kelly and her daddy (father of the groom) sharing a dance.  

And Finally, a FAMILY picture. We love this photo. Not only is it one of the two photos that we have of us as a family, but Korbin Bru is actually looking at the camera and SMILING in this one!  I so love my "Men" in black!  I will surely be makign this into a canvas print for our house.

Now, after the festivities, we hung around for a while. Then, it was inching ever so close to Korbin Bru's bedtime, so we decided to hit the road. We went back to our family's house to change and give Korbin one last bottle before we hit the road. He "quick" woke several times on the trip to cry for a second. The night was rough with him waking a total of 5 times after we got home at 11:30.

All in all, roadtrips are tough- tough on the little ones and tough on the parents. It takes your little one off of the schedule and routine that they are so used to. It is a good idea to try to keep everything as consistant as possible in spite of the changes. Babies like predictability.

Wedding: Our First Roadtrip with a Baby

So, last weekend we went on a road trip with the baby. My cousin was getting married in Nashville and that was one wedding that I could not miss. I really loved the decor as I am a fan of burlap and mason jars. I also really liked the idea of the tree pieces. I saw more places to incorporate these where they didn't, like on the candy table or cake table which I didn't get any pictures of. I also thought this would have been a great guest book alternative. 

 I love the "M". I have Korbin Bru's initials in his nursery but I would love to have a "B" for our front door. I thought it was cute to have the glasses on the table. I think though I would have done redneck mason jars though for an extra "rustic" touch.

I loved this gazebo for the wedding. I thought that the burlap wrapped around the iron gave it a nice touch. The view was really pretty there at the Pick Inn.  

 I love the green mum flowers and Gerber daisies. They took a place in my own bouquet when Jeff and I were married in Vegas. 

Traveling with a baby left me feeling a little nervous. The hubby and I discussed leaving at night so that our little man would sleep all the way there and not disrupt his schedule. In the end, I was overruled by my parents who were going with us. They thought that the wedding itself would be a disruption to his schedule and that we should just give it a try. We ended up leaving at about 8 ish in the morning. We stopped at the Cracker Barrel for breakfast and little man was especially good. We took in his little boppy floppy thing- I don't know what else to call it- to use in a high chair but he was happy in his car seat. We did end up getting him out of the seat for a little while prior to us leaving because I couldn't stomach the thought of him being "trapped" in his car seat for over an hour.  He fell asleep after we got back on the road and took a 2 hour and 15 minute nap.We originally had stops planned but all decided as long as he was sleeping we were going to DRIVE! He woke for about the last 30-45 minutes and was an angel for all except  the last 10 ish minutes in which he had a diaper explosion and was getting hungry. So, far so good. But.....we still have a wedding to get through and the trip back home. 

Sleeping like a baby...YEAH RIGHT!

I have no clue who came up with or coined the phrase "sleep like a baby" but I would really and truly like to either HULK SMASH or drop kick him or her in the head because if you have ever really watched a sleeping baby for a long period of time it is ANYTHING but peaceful! This idiom was truly created by an idio-(t). Whoever came up with that sentiment most definitely did not have children with sleep issues, if he or she had children at all. (which I suspect not). 

Me; however, I feel like I have done everything to try to help my little guy get the sleep WE all deserve. I've read books, consulted mothers, purchased upteen products "guaranteed to help your baby sleep" (please), tried different techniques and methods (thank you but no thank you FERBER, BABY WISE, and whoever else wanted to throw their two cents in) to get my little one to sleep all night, but I have had no success. So if any of you out there have a better idea or some kind of help, I am LISTENING!!!!

Don't I look like I am ready for sleep? Heck no...let's party...in my crib!

My son is now 8 months old and only slept through the night 2-3 times! 

And one wonders why when someone asks me when I'm having another one they are greeted with a long line of expletives before a solid and resounding NO! Never, nada, no way, no how, when pigs fly, etc etc. Ask me again when I don't have bags under my eyes from lack of sleep. But the answer would still be a bleep NO! 

No this is not his crib-he doesn't have toys in his sleep space.

Not that I don't love my son, but the physical exhaustion that comes with a baby who doesn't sleep is well, exhausting. I couldn't imagine trying to deal with another non-sleeper. 

. Plus, I am a belly sleeper. It might be okay with mommy if I didn't insist on sleeping not with my head to the side like in the picture but absolutely face down, flat against the crib mattress. If the fact that I didn't sleep good before, the fact that my mommy comes in to check on me many times a night probably wakes me up more than my regular wake up cycle. 

May 2013 Prom: Barefoot Style

Prom: That word strikes fear into the hearts of mothers and fathers all over the country. Especially since I read this morning in the paper that the cost for Prom on a national average is now over $ 1000 dollars for things like the dress, the food, the party, the flowers, the tux, the photography. I am almost glad that I will not have to spend upteen hundred dollars on a dress for a daughter...I get to do the tuxes. 

While I am too old to attend prom myself, I still enjoy looking at all the dresses. I have another reason to "window shop" for a formal this year. It is my husband's 10 year reunion for his military unit. This requires a trip to Savannah, GA, and they will have a formal night complete with photos, dinner and dancing. As a new mommy, I want to be respectably dressed, but as myself, I still want to be Jone. I don't want to be defined by my "mommyhood" status. I am still a relatively young woman and my mommy body is not at all atrocious. So, in other words, I want to look hot! I am really loving Number 3! Unfortunately, I am not a stand out in the crowd kind of dresser so my color palate is pretty basic: pinks, whites, blacks and grays. I am more after the things that make the dress special-a cut, a ruffle, a fit and less concerned with the color.

Top Row:

1: white and pink dress     2: white dress         3: black sash dress         4: black and white

Bottom Row

5: backless dress              6: feather dress       7: pink dress                  8 zebra dress

Cinco De Mayo-Stuffed Peppers Revisited

Last year for our Cinco de Mayo party, Christa and I came up with this little appetizer (here). This year, we have updated them a little bit. They have this new Philadelphia Spicy Jalapeno cream cheese instead of the regular block of cream cheese. The unfortunate thing is that this is not fat free but okay for this occasion. Also, we added a can of green chilis to the mix (with the juice) instead of the jalapenos this time.





Cinco De Mayo Stuffed Peppers (Revisted)

Ingredients

• 2 bags of mini peppers (capped, de-seeded, and halved)
• a tub (or two :) of Spicy Jalapeno Cream Cheese
• Taco meat-just as much as you wish 
• Onion (we were running short on time so we used minced onion) Again no real measurement, just preference
• small can of green chilis (juice included)
• Mexican cheese (to spread on top)

Boil the peppers for about 2-3 minutes just to soften a little. While they are boiling, mix the cream cheese, taco meat, onion and green chilis together. Get the peppers out and drain them well. Then spread the mixture into the peppers and top with cheese. Bake at 350 until the cheese and melted or slightly browned. 

The inspiration behind this board is from Little Baby Garvin